You ever have those days when something just doesn't seem to fit correctly? I'm not talking about clothes or anything like that. I'm talking about things that you love, but for some reason, on any particular day, just don't seem to fit mentally.
Perhaps you are a little lost. I will explain: I listen to music everyday. I have it. It's almost a biological need... like food or water or shelter. I need it, in some form, to survive. Today, I especially needed it. No real reason in particular... it just felt like my brain needed it. This sounds weird, but that's what it feels like.
However, my dilemma is that no matter what music I tried, nothing seemed to fit. Nothing satiated my desire for musical sounds and rhythms. I scrolled through all the music on my iPod, desperately trying different things, hoping one of them would stick. Coldplay. Damien Rice. Dead or Alive. Death Cab for Cutie. Duncan Sheik. Elton John. Genesis. Jane's Addiction. Madness. Mazzy Star. Modest Mouse. New Order. Ok Go. I tried them all. Even Paul Simon's "Kodachrome" gave me no relief. I thought Plain White T's "Hey There, Delilah" was going to work, but it didn't.
My God, what was I going to do?? Then, for shits and giggled, I put on a song I don't listen to often. It's a fun song, and I enjoy it... I just don't typically choose to listen to it that often. But of course, this is the song that finally worked. This is the song that finally released the anxiety and pressure building up in my head.
What was that song you ask?
You asked for it (I dare you not to smile):
What's wrong with me? Hahaha...
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
Where is Kyle?
Dear Faithful Readers,
Hello! And Welcome back to my blog. I haven't updated in a few weeks, but rest assured, I am still here. Unfortunately, I only seem to be able to stop by periodically.
This semester has been pretty crazy. Lots of crap going on. Lots of papers getting written. Mid-terms and such. Luckily there are only a few weeks left of the semester, which is actually pretty scary. That means there are only a couple more months before I have to get started on my life in the "real world."
But until then, I just have to sit back, relax, and remember that I'm still in college. That said, I've been doing a lot of procrastinating. Two weeks ago I became obsessed with missing 24-year-old Kyle Fleischmann. He went missing Nov. 9, 2007 around 2 or 3 am from the Buckhead Saloon in uptown Charlotte, NC. Police and volunteers have been searching the area since then, but there has been no sign of him (that I'm aware of). I've slacked off a little in my following of the story, but there haven't really been any new developments. But if you have any information please contact Crime Stoppers at 704.334.1600.
I feel strangely drawn to the whole case, as if I feel some responsibility to help find him. When they had the sweep a couple weekends ago, I was sad that I wasn't going to be in Charlotte to help. I don't know why, but I feel like I need to help. But I don't know how I can do that from here other than to let my readers (all 2 of them) know.
I don't know. In other news, I went shopping on Black Friday. It was kinda cool. There were so many people there. Kinda like this:
Only there were many, many more people, and we were organized into a line. There had to be like 1,000 people in front of me, and I got there at 4:15am! And the store opened at 5am! I still got what I wanted though.
The Office, Season 1: $8.99
The Office, Season 2: $12.99
and a few other movies. It's all pretty sweet, haha. They're my Christmas present to myself. I think I'll like them.
Other than that, there's not much going on in my world. How was your day?
Hello! And Welcome back to my blog. I haven't updated in a few weeks, but rest assured, I am still here. Unfortunately, I only seem to be able to stop by periodically.
This semester has been pretty crazy. Lots of crap going on. Lots of papers getting written. Mid-terms and such. Luckily there are only a few weeks left of the semester, which is actually pretty scary. That means there are only a couple more months before I have to get started on my life in the "real world."
But until then, I just have to sit back, relax, and remember that I'm still in college. That said, I've been doing a lot of procrastinating. Two weeks ago I became obsessed with missing 24-year-old Kyle Fleischmann. He went missing Nov. 9, 2007 around 2 or 3 am from the Buckhead Saloon in uptown Charlotte, NC. Police and volunteers have been searching the area since then, but there has been no sign of him (that I'm aware of). I've slacked off a little in my following of the story, but there haven't really been any new developments. But if you have any information please contact Crime Stoppers at 704.334.1600.
I feel strangely drawn to the whole case, as if I feel some responsibility to help find him. When they had the sweep a couple weekends ago, I was sad that I wasn't going to be in Charlotte to help. I don't know why, but I feel like I need to help. But I don't know how I can do that from here other than to let my readers (all 2 of them) know.
I don't know. In other news, I went shopping on Black Friday. It was kinda cool. There were so many people there. Kinda like this:
Only there were many, many more people, and we were organized into a line. There had to be like 1,000 people in front of me, and I got there at 4:15am! And the store opened at 5am! I still got what I wanted though.The Office, Season 1: $8.99
The Office, Season 2: $12.99
and a few other movies. It's all pretty sweet, haha. They're my Christmas present to myself. I think I'll like them.
Other than that, there's not much going on in my world. How was your day?
Friday, November 09, 2007
Song Headache (a real one this time, haha)
The mind is amazing thing. One of the wonders of the mind is the random appearance of a song.
Why does a song, a song we haven't thought of in years, a song we learned the words to years ago, suddenly pop into our heads, unannounced?
Why, when I was doing laundry earlier, did a song we used to sing in elementary school suddenly spring into my head? When I was in second grade or something like that, we used to have assemblies about imagination and I don't even remember what. It was held in the gym/multi-purpose room. We would "fly" on our "magic carpets" (a.k.a. sitting on a carpet square) to far off lands and learn valuable cultural and imaginative lessons. Our gym teacher (Ms. Clarkson?) and our art teacher (Mrs. Rutherford?) would lead us in a song before every "flight."
I was 7 years old. And I still remember all of the words.
Come take a ride on the magic carpet
Come exploring with me
We'll see the sights from the highest mountains
To the lowest depths of the sea
So many miracles
So much to learn
So many things to see and to do
I don't think that anything could be more fun
Than seeing them and doing them with you!
So come take a ride on the magic carpet
A truly miraculous, magic carpet!
Come exploring with me!
Hahaha, some of the things I remember are so bizarre. :)
Why does a song, a song we haven't thought of in years, a song we learned the words to years ago, suddenly pop into our heads, unannounced?
Why, when I was doing laundry earlier, did a song we used to sing in elementary school suddenly spring into my head? When I was in second grade or something like that, we used to have assemblies about imagination and I don't even remember what. It was held in the gym/multi-purpose room. We would "fly" on our "magic carpets" (a.k.a. sitting on a carpet square) to far off lands and learn valuable cultural and imaginative lessons. Our gym teacher (Ms. Clarkson?) and our art teacher (Mrs. Rutherford?) would lead us in a song before every "flight."
I was 7 years old. And I still remember all of the words.
Come take a ride on the magic carpet
Come exploring with me
We'll see the sights from the highest mountains
To the lowest depths of the sea
So many miracles
So much to learn
So many things to see and to do
I don't think that anything could be more fun
Than seeing them and doing them with you!
So come take a ride on the magic carpet
A truly miraculous, magic carpet!
Come exploring with me!
Hahaha, some of the things I remember are so bizarre. :)
Thursday, November 08, 2007
November Blues
So, I realize that it's been like a month. I'm really bad at updating this thing. It's really a shame. I could update this more frequently, but this semester has been a total energy and time eater. I have no idea how it's already November. October came and went, and I barely remember it. And where the hell did September go? I've been trying to take like one day at a time, but they're still slipping away. I'm not an alcoholic or anything, but I figured if I can go one day without breaking down (which doesn't happen that often), then I can get through this stress and I can make it out alive.
I've realized that's what I really want. I just want to make it out of college alive.
It's my last year. This should be fun, but all I feel is depressed and stressed out. There are a million things I have to do before I go. Also, I have recently realized (and blogged about over the summer), I don't think I'm ready to enter the real world. The prospect of having to get an apartment and get a job and pay for my own health insurance and bills scares me to freaking death. I've desperately wanted all this for the past four years, but now that it's imminent, I don't know what I'm going to do with myself.
Also, I think my parents may move. This is a BIG deal. No, it's not really that big a deal, but my parents have lived in the same house since I was 4 (minus the year or so we lived in the apartment). We lived there when I started school, and it's always been the home I've gone to when on break from college. I'd say like 90% of my childhood memories are at that house, and now they may be moving.
View Larger Map
My dad may be getting a job in Raleigh. We have to wait and see, but if he does, that's a 3 hour commute, and that ain't happening. So they'd have to move. Which means that my permanent address is going to change (though i'm going to have to get one of my own soon anyway). So now when I go "home" I'm going to be 3 hours from my friends and my memories. And it's funny that in the midst of being afraid of being away from friends and memories... my brain also found it necessary to note how far I'd be from Manifest... I <3 Manifest...
I've realized that's what I really want. I just want to make it out of college alive.
It's my last year. This should be fun, but all I feel is depressed and stressed out. There are a million things I have to do before I go. Also, I have recently realized (and blogged about over the summer), I don't think I'm ready to enter the real world. The prospect of having to get an apartment and get a job and pay for my own health insurance and bills scares me to freaking death. I've desperately wanted all this for the past four years, but now that it's imminent, I don't know what I'm going to do with myself.
Also, I think my parents may move. This is a BIG deal. No, it's not really that big a deal, but my parents have lived in the same house since I was 4 (minus the year or so we lived in the apartment). We lived there when I started school, and it's always been the home I've gone to when on break from college. I'd say like 90% of my childhood memories are at that house, and now they may be moving.
View Larger Map
My dad may be getting a job in Raleigh. We have to wait and see, but if he does, that's a 3 hour commute, and that ain't happening. So they'd have to move. Which means that my permanent address is going to change (though i'm going to have to get one of my own soon anyway). So now when I go "home" I'm going to be 3 hours from my friends and my memories. And it's funny that in the midst of being afraid of being away from friends and memories... my brain also found it necessary to note how far I'd be from Manifest... I <3 Manifest...
There's something wrong with me... 
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