I just felt like bloggin'.....

That title is funniest when said in a Forrest Gump voice, hehe.

But seriously, I did. It's approximately 1:14am and I'm not tired at all. Maybe because I woke up at like 11:30. I try not to wake up that late, but I can't help it. But I feel like my entire day is gone if I wake up after noon. It really sucks. Haven't been up to much. On Friday, Alison, Mary Ann and I went to see my musician friend play at this wine shop in the university area. He was pretty good. I told him to play Josh Rouse and he played my favorite song. That made me extremely happy. I told him to play more Josh Rouse when I talked to him between sets, but he forgot. It was okay though because he played my other requests: Damien Rice, The Fray, and an original song called "Grace" that I am absolutely in love with. It's sad and heartfelt. It's wonderful to see/hear performed. Unfortunately it was hard to enjoy it because I could tell my friends were getting antsy and wanted to leave; we had been there for over 4 hours already, hahaha. Plus the rest of the crowd was getting loud and drunk and annoying (stupid whores, hahah). Also, for reasons unknown, we plunked down at a table kinda far away from him. So that kinda sucked. I promised him next time we'd sit closer; he wants our applause to spread to the rest of the crowd so that they pay attention to him, hahaha. Or at least more attention. Oh well. Next time I'll sit closer.

Saturday was Alison's surprise birthday party. Her birthday isn't until today (Tuesday), but it was the weekend, so we had it. It was kinda cool. I'd never been to a surprise party before. Her parents planned it; but my job was to get a group of friends there. Mary Ann helped, haha. It was really cute. Alison was really surprised; she had no idea. The beginning of the party was kind of emotional, haha. It was sweet and fun. Afterwards a few of us ventured on to the movies where we saw You, Me & Dupree. It was kind of a feel good movie, haha. It was cute actually. Is it just me, or does Owen Wilson play fly-by-the-seat-of-his-pants characters every time? Oh well, he's good at it, heh. It really was a cute movie. Kate Hudson is my girl crush. I love her. Hahaha. I want to be her when I grow up :P

Also, I finally found a creative outlet. I could feel this need for creativity building up for a couple weeks now. I try to write more to my story when I feel that, but it didn't work this time. I bought a sketchbook and some very nice color (or "colour" according to the box) pencils and started to draw. So far it's just a couple pics of Chris Martin of Coldplay. The first one I did was pretty good, if I may say so myself. But the second one is not so good. The black charcoal pencil smeared a little more than I anticipated so now his face is gray-peach, haha. It's not that great; I didn't even really finish it because I couldn't get rid of the gray. His mustache is not done, his nose looks funny, and he looks bald, haha. Oh well. The first one is pretty life like though, I guess. I'll continue to attempt to master my nonskills. Doesn't really matter though; it's only for entertainment.... and cheap gifts, haha....

Six-pack o' Nothin'

Not a whole lot to report over here. Still not being honest (see previous entry) about certain things, haha. Maybe at some point this summer. We'll see. *Sigh* Heh.

I've been having these weird dreams lately. They're not really weird in that the plot of the dream is weird; just that each one involves a different guy, and heavy flirting. One of them was about Josh Meyers, the dude from MadTV. Just a lot of flirting... I don't remember much else. Another one was about this kid Greg who lived on my floor freshman year, dubbed "The Most Gorgeous Boy in the World" by yours truly. Just a lot of hugging, cuddling and flirting. Mary Ann woke me up from that dream. Dammit. Then there was one about my German teacher from high school, Mr. Land. Oh, Mr. Land.... *drools*. More flirting, talking. He was hot. It was nice, haha. And then I think there was one about he-who-shall-not-be-named, hahah :). More of the same. Then last night I had this weird dream about this other kid Marko who used to go to school with me. This one had a heavier mood than the others; he was meaner to me, and there was really no flirting... though he let me stay at his place while he was gone (haha?). I think I'm over-sexed. Or under-sexed. One of them. Hahaha... but ooh... those were some gorgeous men in my dreams, hahaha.

In Music News: I'm still obsessed with Josh Rouse. He's virtually all I've listened to for 3 weeks. The compilation CD my friend made me has been spinning almost constantly in my car. The only time it's not in there is when another Josh Rouse cd (1972) is playing. Or when my friend is in fact playing, haha. But seriously, I wish I had known about this guy sooner. I don't use this phrase often, but I think his music is potentially life changing. Seriously. I can't even count how many times I've listened to "Comeback" these past few weeks. And now I've discovered a new song. It's called "Its the Nighttime." I haven't even formulated words for it yet. But let me put it this way. I wish that someone would sing it to me. Perhaps even he-who-shall-not-be-named, hehehe. :D

Poignant Quotes...

I love to read. And more than anything else, I love to take pieces of philosophy from the books I read and write them down so that I never forget them. I recently found an old notebook I use to write down such quotes and other moving passages (usually song lyrics). I haven't opened it in months, so I started reading some of the quotes I've taken from books that I thought were so insightful. Here are a few:

"And maybe you don't go to hell for the things you do. Maybe you go to hell for the things you don't do." -- Lullaby, Chuck Palahniuk, p. 175.

"Game shows are designed to make us feel better about the random, useless facts that are all we have left of our education." -- Invisible Monsters, Chuck Palahniuk, p. 103

"When we don't know who to hate, we hate ourselves." Invisible Monsters, p. 104

"What you don't understand you can make mean anything." Diary, Chuck Palahniuk, p. 134

"According to Plato, we don't learn anything. Our soul has lived so many lives that we know everything. Teachers and education can only remind us of what we already know." Diary, p. 188.

"Why is it that you feel like a dope if you laugh alone, but that's usually how you end up crying?" Invisible Monsters, p. 121

Okay, so most of them are from the same author, haha. But I don't think that makes them any less true or even jarring. That last one is especially telling. Why is it that we often just cry by ourselves? Perhaps it's just ingrained in our minds to be strong and not let others see our weaknesses. I never understood that ideal. I think that if everyone was as open with each other as we are with ourselves we'd have a lot more happiness in this world (not to sound all hippie-y or anything). If we could tell each other the truth, the truth of what we are feeling... there'd be less pain. I mean, obviously, yes there would be. But if little Billy could just tell his mommy that he broke the window, he wouldn't have to see her afraid of burglars. Or if Cindy could tell anyone about what Old Man Jenkins does to her behind the barn, she wouldn't hate herself quite as much..... If I only could tell him that I think he's talented, intelligent, kind, attractive, and all-around wonderful, maybe then he could let go and allow himself to open up a little more. And then maybe I wouldn't feel so nervous around him.

*sigh* if only we could be honest, eh? Heh.... ;)

God, I hope he never reads this.... hahahaha.... or figures out I'm talking about him.... *embarrassed* hahaha:)